


finding normal

by missmayhem



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel (Movies), The Avengers (2012), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Depression, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-28
Updated: 2013-04-28
Packaged: 2017-12-09 20:22:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/777625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missmayhem/pseuds/missmayhem
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve learns to cope.</p>
            </blockquote>





	finding normal

**Author's Note:**

> No beta so the only thing I own is the mistakes.

His long nap hadn't really hit home untill he found out Peggy was dead. He had gone to the gym in a red haze. And ripped it apart. He had the foresight to lock himself in but still an hour later the gym had looked like a war zone.  
When he was done he stumbled out calmer but shaking to find Fury lent up againt the wall just waiting for him.  
'Bill me' was the only thing he said as he walked away.  
Fury watched him leave his face grim in worry and feeling ten years old then his actual age.  
Steve slept the night a full eight hours. The longest since he had woken up.  
The next morning art supplies were on his door step.  
He burnt through them in a day.  
His days bleed into each other.  
It was eating and punching drawing and sleeping.  
Then New York happened and Tony Stark and the Avengers  
And for a while things seemed to get a little better the number of punch bag fatalities decreased- still high but the gym stayed intact. But now it was his sleeping that suffered.  
Before the Nap his team mates were with him as he discovered the his new abilities. They laughed and joked and made him feel normal and still, well, himself.  
Now. There wasn't any real normal the closest was Miss Potts. But she had the patience of a saint and away a lot of the time. He missed the rowdiness of his former teams mates and sleeping had become too tempting. When he would wake he tried so hard to cling to the last wisp of his dreams where for a few moments he could believe they were still alive. But he lingered more and more of late. Just laying there inside his own head. Sometimes he gave in only to find that he had laid for hours dreaming about Before, trapped.  
Drawing wasn't help. No matter what he could see. No matter where he was his pictures were all the same. They were the past. He sat in central park and drew Peggy in that red dress or bucky falling untill once again he had burnt through his art supplies with only the same images to show time after time.  
And trying to vent his frustrations was becoming mundane. The punching bag had become useless. One good punch and it split.  
He wanted to...... He needed.... Something.  
All this power and energy and no where for it to go was becoming to much. 

It started slowly. Tony in his boredom had modified his bike. Driving was freeing. His super senses meant he could get out of the city and really go. The cost of fuel nearly made him fall over but it was still cheaper then wrecking the gym every other week.

Then Thor came back and with it, Jane and Darcy.  
Steve was happy for the company.  
But when Thor offered to spar with him Steve had suppressed the urge to hug him.  
'The battle was epic' and 'to be repeated.' Thor announced to Jane a few hours later. After the first round Steve stopped pulling his punches. He still lost but he was so tired and relax he didn't care.  
Steve slept like a log that night.  
The next morning he woke to the smell of food he hurried to get dressed his stomach rumbling in hunger. In the kitchen he found Darcy and Jane. The latter talking a mile a minute and the former cooking pancakes, just listening.  
It wasn't long before Thor joined then and then tony appeared just as the pancakes were done, at least the first batch. Then came Bacon and eggs. Breakfast lasted for hours talking and laughing. Thor, Tony and Darcy in a weird one-up-man-ship each tale funnier than the previous. When Steve left the kitchen (after helping with the dishes) he felt full and warm and happy.

His days were individual. They still had eating and sleeping and drawing but now they had talking and laughing and sharing and hanging out and watching movies.  
He was surrounded by friends and team mates. And he had yet to beat Thor.

He felt normal.


End file.
